Managing Depression after a Loved One Has Committed Suicide
Dealing with the fact that a loved one has passed away is difficult. Dealing with the death of a loved one that has committed suicide adds a tremendous amount of devastation on an individual. Coping with suicide is one of the most complicated situations that a person can be subjected to. When a person does away with themselves, the people that are left to deal with the tragedy often experience many emotions and questions. Even in cases where a “note” is left explaining to loved ones their reasoning for committing such an act, it does not alleviate the burden of the act. Depression commonly occurs in people who are left behind. This is especially true of the people who were closest to the person that has died. It is essential to learn to manage depression after a loved one has committed suicide.
One of the first emotions that will occur after a suicide is shock. Usually, shock is followed by anger. Many people hide the emotion of anger from others due to the fact that they feel that they will be condemned for experiencing this. However, when a loved one is dead as a result of suicide, this is to be expected. You may be angry that the person did not talk to you about how they were feeling. You may be the spouse, and may be angry because they left you to explain their death to your children. You may be angry for any number of reasons. It is perfectly normal to become angry in this situation. You should never go through this alone. It is very important that you share your anger with someone that is close to you. If you are unable to do this, you should discuss it with a member of clergy, or even to a counselor.
As you go through the grieving process, you may find that you blame yourself for the act that your loved one committed. You may not have answered that call from them last week. You may have cancelled lunch plans with them a month ago. Perhaps you forgot to answer that last email…there are so many ways that you can blame yourself for what happened. The important thing is that you do not. It is imperative that you understand that a person who is in the state of mind to commit such an act is not thinking in a rational manner. That person is often overwhelmed with an assortment of emotions and do not know any other way to resolve their issues. They may have simply chosen to give up for one reason or another and not even tried to reach a resolution. It is never your fault. You are not responsible for their actions, only they are.
If you are trying to find ways to manage depression after a loved one has committed suicide, you may try support groups. Often, these groups have counseling sessions in which a group of people with similar incidents come together to share their experiences. In addition to this, these groups may engage in activities that are fun to everyone. While you may have been left behind, it is important to manage your depression and not stagnate in one state of mind for a long period of time. Just remember, you still have your whole life ahead of you. It is the person that ended their life prematurely that chooses not to live the rest of their life, not you.
